Well, there’s only an hour left in Women In History month and here I have yet to write about it.

Luckily, Vivi started a conversation at dinner tonight that showed me a perfect example of why it’s important for us to know more about the role women have played in the past so we can point our daughters towards examples for the future.

“Mama? Did you know that when computers were first invented they were as big as like THREE of our house? Or even three of my school?”

G opened his mouth to correct her estimation math then decided to let the hyperbole ride.

“I did know that! They had names like ENIAC and UNIVAC and it took whole teams of people to run them.”

“Mama? Did you know that those big computers could get bugs in them? Not real bugs but….glitches…but one time?…IT WAS A REAL BUG!”

“Yes! Did you know that a woman named Grace Hopper came up with the word ‘bug’ for a computer problem? One time she was fixing a computer and discovered that a moth had flown inside it!”

“What was her name? Harper?”

“Grace Hopper. Actually, Rear Admiral Grace Hopper. That was her title in the Navy. She wrote a program called COBOL that made computers work a whole lot more easily.”

G joined in. “Vivi? Did you know that those giant computers that were as big as our house weren’t even as powerful as your computer in your room or even my phone?”

Vivi nodded while she chewed on some pork chop. They cover so much in second grade these days.

“And they still managed to get us to the moon!” G said.

I jumped in. “AND did you know there was a whole group of women who were so good at the math that NASA had them check what the computers were doing? And it was a woman mathematician who wrote the program that told the computers how to fly the Apollo missions to the moon? I can’t remember her name off the top of my head but I remember a wonderful picture of her standing next to the books and books of code and the program that she wrote was taller than she was!” (Her name is Margaret Hamilton.)

“That’s what I loved about ‘Apollo 13’…when the astronauts were trapped up there and having to do MATH to get back home! Having to do math to survive. Man, the pressure was on.” I took a breath and chased the last grains of rice around my plate.

“Why did they have to do math to get home?” Vivi asked. Um…I looked at G but he was chewing. Crap. He’s supposed to handle the sciences and I do humanities. “Well. Um, they had to uh figure out angles and how fast they were going and such so they wouldn’t burn up when they came back into the atmosphere.” She accepted that answer, thank heavens, because it’s about the extent of my ability to explain break-neck geometry.

Now, don’t get the idea that we talk like this at the table all the time. There were also a couple of fart jokes and a little bit of off-key singing. But when I was preparing that talk for Missouri State a few weeks ago, one of the points I made was that we have to get familiar with the stories of women that have been minimized or omitted from history so that they can become common knowledge again.

Here’s a current example…from Disney Junior (because that’s the real noise in this house):

On the new show “Miles From Tomorrowland,” these characters are the Admirals Watson and Crick. They’re a pair of conjoined, three-eyed green men who send Miles and his family on missions to explore space. Anywho…Vivi and Carlos will grow up hearing the names Watson and Crick because of this show.

Who are these green guys named after? That would be James Watson and Francis Crick, the pair of English scientists who won the Nobel Prize for decoding the double helix structure of the DNA molecule. Good for them! Scientists had been working for years on figuring out how the components of this molecule could be arranged as a chain but also compactly. So yeah, that’s a pretty big deal and you get famous and you win prize money and eventually you become part of pop culture in the form of a Disney cartoon. And little kids grow up to be big people who remember your name and you become part of history and dinner table conversations.

BUT.

My kids won’t hear about Rosalind Franklin on Disney Junior. Who was Rosalind Franklin, you ask? She was a young British chemist who became an expert in the field of X-ray crystallography–capturing images of the structure of crystals. Franklin had captured images that proved the double helix structure of DNA molecules. These images were shared–without her permission–with Watson and Crick by a fellow researcher named Wilkins, with whom Franklin had a disagreement. Their paper got published first and Rosalind Franklin died at the age of 37 from ovarian cancer.  Watson, Crick, and Wilkins won the Nobel Prize in 1962.

She did the work, but no prize. Her story is being restored to history, but it’s too late now to get a cartoon character.

Because that’s the thing–if our names aren’t included in the history books, they’ll never make it into pop culture. Little girls will think of Paul Revere because they’ve never heard of Sybil Ludington.

Never heard of Sybil Ludington? Oh, here‘s her story…

 

Carlos: “Mommy, put my cold milk in the foodgerator.” (Refrigerator)

Vivi: (while standing in front of our side-by-side refrigerator) “If this side is the fridge, is this side the erator?” (No, dear, it’s the freezer.)

Carlos: “Mommy work on her punkcuter.” (Computer)

Vivi: “Can I drain the spaghetti in the…in the…noodler?” (That’s the collander.)

Victoria: (from many years ago) “Daddy is from Brasil, they speak porkacheese.” (Portuguese)

Victoria: (naming the 13 colonies) Georgia, Virginia, Delaware, North California, South California, New York, Connecticuts, Vermont, New Hamster…

It dawned on me today, after talking to Carlos’ teachers about the progress he’s making in communication, that the days of these sweet garbles are passing by quickly. I remember my Grandmama Irene once showed me a yellow legal pad where she had written down some of the funny things that my mom and Aunt Dixie had said as girls. Aunt Dixie liked to use the ruler “to inch stuff.” (measure)

My baby is inching on up there.

What were some of your favorite expressions that you’re kids created?

Richard and I got married ten years ago today. All day long (and it’s been a LONG day), I’ve wanted a taste of wedding cake.

Our wedding cake was made by Cecelia Villaveces’ bakery here in Athens. The bottom layer was vanilla, the top chocolate. The whole thing wrapped in white buttercream icing. After Richard and I shared a bite, my friend, Sasha, sliced it up for the guests and served it on little glass plates. So sweet.

I’ve been thinking today about the youngest guests at that wedding–my brother’s sons, Grant and Jake. Let’s see, Grant is driving now so at the time they would have been 6 and 3. It was chilly that day, so they were dressed in turtlenecks and dress pants. I just remembered that Joe and Beth should have been on the way to Mexico for their annual spring break getaway, but they came to celebrate with us instead. I am so grateful for that.

The boys were in fine form that sunny day. After the ceremony, when the men were rolling up the Persian rug that we had used under the tent, I remember Grant and Jake insisting on “helping” to carry it back up the hill. Then they rolled down the hill until they had grass in their hair. I remember Jake chatting with Richard’s dad and how it tugged at my heart to see him with a little boy as his only son was dying.

As the luncheon wound down, Grant came by the little table where Richard and I were sitting to visit with us. He told me that he had been named student of the week. He was so proud of himself. I bragged on him and we clinked our glasses together in a toast to his success. Then he said, “Aunt Ashley? When are we gonna cut that cake?” I assured him that it wouldn’t be much longer. Then I leaned in close and whispered, “And YOU get to have the first slice because YOU are student of the week!”

We gathered around the cake table. Richard and I shared a little bite. The boys stood right at my elbow, first in line. Grant took his plate and walked back to the table where his parents waited. Big Gay overheard Grant as he looked his very health-conscious mother in the eye and said, “Aunt Ashley said I could have the biggest slice of cake and you can’t say no because she is THE BRIDE!”

Special days call for cake, so Grant and Jake each had a slice then lined up for another one. When it was Jake’s turn, Sasha asked if he wanted chocolate or vanilla.  Jake squinted at the cake and pointed to the top chocolate tier. “I want some…I want…um….gimme some UP!”

The adults in earshot laughed pretty soon we were all asking for “up” instead of chocolate.

That night, after the meds had been infused and the family was in bed, I sat up late writing thank you notes. The remains of the cake called to me from a white cardboard box in the center of the dining table. I opened the lid. All the up was gone, so I cut a slice of down. It was still deliciously sweet, but all I had to choose from.

Today’s the kind of day when I just want some up.