I haven’t written in over a week, but it’s really not my fault. I’ve been trying. I even stuck my head in the oven but to no avail.
There’s a legal concept called “chain of causation” by which a person who appears to be at fault can prove that a chain of events lined up to create the situation…thus removing the fault from the individual.
Here’s what happened this weekend when I tried to write a post.
Last month, I got a copy of 40th anniversary update of “The Moosewood Cookbook” from a publisher in exchange for an honest review. And you can’t review a cookbook without trying some of the recipes, right? So I found the recipe with the fewest ingredients, one that barely took up half a page. French Onion Soup. YUM.
I bought the onions…last month.
Then life happened.
A lot.
So by the time I got around to trying the recipe, the onions had started to pursue their dream of starting a family, sprouting green shoots that were heading for the sunny window. OK.
So I picked a different recipe…something bakish because I actually had yeast. Again, I checked for a recipe that had fewest ingredients, short instructions, no trips to Williams-Sonoma for special equipment. Focaccia! YUM.
But baking….problematic. Lately, anytime I try to get the oven over 300 degrees, the smoke alarm goes off (thanks to some apple pies, pizzas, and malaise).
I can’t have the smoke alarm going off because my baby hates loud, sudden noises.
By this point, how can I write a blog post without putting my son’s emotional stability at risk? Time to clean my oven.
Historically, I only clean the oven when I’m moving and the security deposit depends on a shiny oven. I’ve lived here since 2003. You do the math.
Soooooo…instead of using the self-cleaning function, I got myself some Easy-Off to really tackle the grime.
I tackled the hell out of that grime.
Spent so long cleaning the oven that I ran out of time to let the dough rise…so no focaccia. (Am I even spelling that right?)
BUT! Progress. Clean oven, week ahead of me…surely I can knock out some focaccia.
Turn the oven on Monday and it makes a strange beeping noise and flashes F4 on the panel.
After a little Googling of “Kenmore oven F4 error message,” I discover that I’ve got a broken temperature sensor.
Ohhhh…that’s what that long spiky thing was that I was wiggling around while cleaning the grime. Ah.
See how long this chain is and we ain’t nary closer to focaccia or a blog post?
This is why nothing ever seems to get DONE around here. Set off in one direction with a plan and pfffffffffft. I trip all over the great Chain of Causation.
P.S. – While I was cleaning the oven, someone clogged up a toilet and that cost us another $403. I would drown my feelings in carbs, but…FOCCACHIT.
You are my O-fficial patron saint. I worship your brain, humor, resiliency and choice of words.
Aw, shucks! Thanks!
Yes, that’s how you spell it. 🙂 It’s a good bread and when you make it, it will be divine. I believe in your abilities.
Life does tend to turn on you, even if being nice about it. Plans had been to spend the recent holiday with my parents, brother and his family at the Parents’ Palace. Then my fur baby had major surgery two days before. He and I weren’t travelling – so, plans changed and my family came to me. *sniff*
Wait ’til you see my ‘causation’ for missing the whole month of November. — besides the gout, which reveals my royal lineage, superior mental chops, and tenacious spirit. Is it Thanksgiving yet?
Pingback: The Moosewood Cookbook: How I Broke My Oven and Learned to Cook Again | Baddest Mother Ever