A Day In the Life of My Bra

Not my actual bra. Way too shiny and tiny!

Not my actual bra. Way too shiny and tiny!

Sleepy sleep sleep until the alarm squawks: BRA OFF

Time to take boy to school and mine likes to be walked in all the way to the classroom: BRA ON

Wait! Girl child says her tummy hurts. I win the coin toss for who works from home: BRA OFF!

An hour later, she feels fine and wants to go to school: BRA ON

Back to work at the dining room table: BRA OFF

OMG it’s SUNNY outside! Think I’ll go for a quick walk around the neighborhood: BRA ON

Sign back in to work: BRA OFF

Time for lunch. Salad from Zaxby’s so I can drive through or sushi from Fresh Market where I’ll have to walk inside? I could just go inside without a bra on but if I go out in public without a bra, your kids are going to learn some lessons about anatomy. So fair warning. And if I have to run, they’re going to learn about physics and cussing too. Hell, even if I’m standing still they’re going to learn about gravity. Hmmm…Zaxby’s it is: BRA OFF!

(I even wore bedroom shoes to guarantee that I wouldn’t be tempted to get out of the car for any reason. Reasons like Chipotle or Menchie’s.)

Salad lunch on the deck? BRA OFF STILLLLLLLL

More work. On the clock with my gals a’flappin. We got a streak going here: BRA REMAINS OFF

Early afternoon and the boy’s teacher calls from school. Now he’s suffering from gastric distress. “I’ll be there to get him in 10 minutes.” Just enough time to get my: BRA ON.

Plop him in front of Disney Jr with a bowl of Jello: BRA OFF (Watch it wiggle, see it jiggle…)

Back to work. Imagine if they knew I was doing all this productive stuff with my: BRA OFF

Text from husband. “Can you pick up the girl?”: BRA ON

“Y’all finish your homework before dinner. I’m going to finish up a few things for work”: BRA OFF

Pulling out stuff to make spaghetti and meatballs…we don’t have spaghetti. To Kroger we go: BRA ON

“Set the table!”: wine poured and BRA OFF

Kids in bed. Not enough steps on the Fitbit. Time for treadmill: BRA ON (because I tried it once with bra off and things got all out of synch)

Day is done, teeth are brushed, alarm is set: BRA OFF

All y’all women who can go through the day with or without a bra, count yourselves lucky. I wore a 38D for years, until I finally got fitted by a real bra expert. I now wear a 38G. I think it stands for “GOOD GOD!!”

What’s your average ON/OFF count for a day?

15 thoughts on “A Day In the Life of My Bra

  1. Lisa in Athens

    Had to sleep in a bra for two weeks, so let’s ignore that. Hmm. Put one one when I get ready for work. Switch bras when I work out. No bra after shower as my next destination is bed.
    Boring.

    Reply
    1. Baddest Mother Ever Post author

      Sleeping in the bra is the WORST! I had to do that while pregnant because they got so big they required a containment system. You wear one while you’re piddling around the house? ACK!

      Reply
  2. Anne

    Maternity leave!! No bra all day unless I need to leave the house. The second best thing about being off 😛

    Reply
    1. Baddest Mother Ever Post author

      Congratulations! I wore camis when I was nursing so I could just whip it out at any moment.

      Reply
  3. Jami Mays

    I’m a 36-I as in, “I can’t believe they make tits this big!” My day is mostly: BRA OFF, but I’m nursing Velcro baby.

    Reply
    1. Baddest Mother Ever Post author

      Hahaha! Oh lordy, nursing boobs were a whole nuther blog post. I miss the connection but oh, the globes.

      Reply
  4. Jennifer Meares

    So funny. I too have a litmus test if activities are bra worthy. Usually once on and once off rule. Once off, I am done. Better have enough groceries because I am not going back

    Reply
  5. Lynn

    Peeling those damn exercise bras OFF after getting sopping wet from the gym. Ugh. I perspire, no, I SWEAT so damn much I can wring the thing out even on cold days.

    Reply
    1. Baddest Mother Ever Post author

      Oh yes. I once got trapped in a tangled up exercise bra inside a bathroom stall. Yikes.

      Reply
  6. Lisa Bagchi

    I always thought the older I got the more often I’d “have” to wear my bra. Turns out, happily, the opposite is true!

    Reply
  7. gritgirl78

    I’m currently at home, nursing twins. There is no bra unless I decide I need to escape the house. Bra off – 4 days a week, & 20 hours a day of the other 3 days!

    Reply
    1. Baddest Mother Ever Post author

      I hear you, girl! I loved wearing little camisoles with built in bras when I was nursing because they gave some support but didn’t get in the way when it was time to serve dinner.

      Reply

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