Gluten Soaked Republican Plastic Surgeons Need Not Apply

Vintage postcard, Picadilly Circus, London

Vintage postcard, Picadilly Circus, London

Have you noticed anything new about the look of the blog? Yep, those are ads. Upppppp there ^^^, and ovvvvver there >>>. I hope you will forgive the crass commercialization of Baddest Mother Ever. I write because it brings me bliss, but my kids don’t eat bliss.

The BlogHer publishing network makes it easy for small publishers like me to find advertising content that matches the audience (hello, tampons and Capri Sun!). They also make it easy for bloggers to find ads that match our ethical boundaries. When I set up my publishing network account, I was given a long list of advertising campaigns from which I could opt out.

Like diet pills–would you REALLY expect to see an ad for diet pills on Baddest Mother Ever? I think not. Or cosmetic surgery. Newp. And religion? This isn’t the place. (But I am intrigued to see what kind of religious ads are available.  “Jesus! Coming Soon to an outlet near you!”)

Some of the options made me think about things that I do support–like breastfeeding. If you are so inclined, you can opt out of any ad for an infant formula, a bottle, a nipple. I was a BF mom, but I’m not opposed to nipples made of something other than me. Animal products–that’s another option I had. I left it open because BACON. Sorry to my vegan friends, but BACON.

Lingerie ads? Hmmm. I was about to check “No” but that depends on the ad. If it’s lingerie that makes women feel more beautiful and comfortable, absolutely. If there is any hint of a pouting ingenue in some Kardashiesque getup…nope.

Gluten? Sure. Because, to quote Jim Gaffigan, I don’t know what gluten is, but it’s delicious.

There was one choice that gave me pause AND reminded me of a funny story. Political ads. Would I want political ads to have space on Baddest Mother Ever? I don’t talk politics very often on here but y’all can probably smell a knee jerk, bleeding heart flaming liberal vibe coming from my general direction. (You’d be right.)

One time, my late husband Richard (who was the opposite of me in all things political and religious) and I were talking about our potential possible children that might one day come.

He asked me, “So what if our kid is born blind?”

I waved away the very thought. “So what? We take what we get and call ourselves lucky.”

“What if our child is gay?”

“Same thing,” I answered. “They’re born whoever they are and we love them no matter what.”

He considered for a second, then said, “What if our kid turns out to be…a Republican?”

I clutched my pearls and gave him the stink-eye. “THAT? That is just poor parenting.”

Hahahaha….I kid, I kid. He and I may have canceled each other’s votes in the big picture, but we were on the same team in the everyday matter of living this life. My dad says that his parents never fought except over local politics. They’d get so mad about county commision or mayor that they wouldn’t speak for days. Legend has it that Grandmama Eunice once threw an entire fried chicken out the car window on the way to a church supper over Grandaddy Joe teasing her about a school board election. If you ever had the honor of tasting her fried chicken, you’d know just what a tragedy that was.

I guess my point is I had to do some thinking about what I feel strongly enough about to BAN from my space. We all do this all the time–and the digital social world that we live in has made it so easy to click a button and decide “I’m don’t want to see that.”

So if you’re a Republican cosmetic surgeon looking for a place to talk about your gluten-filled diet pills, keep moving.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled program!

12 thoughts on “Gluten Soaked Republican Plastic Surgeons Need Not Apply

  1. Deb

    HA! I don’t about other people’s settings, but all the ads show up at the bottom for me. I can read these wonderful words without having to be disturbed by the ads…I guess I have hubs to thank for setting my iPad up to act as a DVR allowing me to skip the ads all together.

  2. Lisa in Athens

    I gave up on arguing politics with Leroy. He just licks himself where male dogs are prone to lick and I figure that’s his opinion of all things. And some days, I get his point entirely.
    Where’s my gluten?

    1. Support

      Oh, that Leroy. Our family disagrees on politics so deeply that we have decided not to discuss it anymore, but we are free to make jokes about it!

  3. Chris Antenen

    I didn’t know anybody else was a FLAMNG liberal. I thought I had that all to myself. I would have loved to figure that out about you, but damn, I already knew. Did you ever think of the significance in our writing group that all three women had the L attached to – well, someplace?. Not the forehead because I think that means loser. Cleavage works for me. I digress, and all the men were of that other persuasion. It’s perfectly clear to me. Wayne is an exception. Thank the powers that be, we find petty stuff to ‘disagree’ about.. What’s gluten, and have I been eating it for all these years and I didn’t know it was bad? And I’m all about bacon.

    1. Support

      Gluten is the stuff in wheat that makes life worth living when it’s processed into flour which is then processed into cake.

      Isn’t it a wonder that we could all be civil and respectful of each other?

  4. Marie

    Another Flaming Liberal here! And I love gluten — and bacon. Fortunately my husband and I agree on politics. Plus he also likes gluten and bacon. 😉


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